Today

Im feeling weak. Im feeling physically weak in my body because of the intense exercising i have been doing recently, and im not smoking- for that i actually feel strong- but just weak. I don't know if the physical weakness has a reflection or causes emotional weakness. But i feel down. Some finalizing of wrapping up a relationship was had on monday night. And although I do feel relieved to finally know where i stand, and to just get on with life. I also do feel very sad. Today, It feels sad. I haunt spoken to him in two days, so it does feel kinda lonely. I miss him. I do. And its so sappy and not very boss bitch to think this way, but i cant really help it. As much as i have been exercising like a bitch at the moment, all i feel like doing is walking. When i walk, my head clears. And i want a clear head. I feel like i could cry at any moment and i don't want to , so walking feels like im walking away from my tears. Maybe im trying to punish my body because i fear i will never be enough for someone.