Am I done? I dont think ive ever felt more done with you then I have right now.
The biggest thing stopping me is the fact that I might regret it.

Facts about this situation right now. You are being a fucking asshole. You wont talk to me, when you do you look at me with HATE in your eyes, but then we hug and kiss goodbye, and when you do, you wont look at me in the eyes because you know you will lose that stubborness . You dont seem to want to improve the situation you seem to want to drag it out. I feel so low on your priority list its not even funny. You dont care about anyone else but yourself in this situation. You dont even care about my feelings and that this is killing me. You told me you didnt want me to leave you. Nothings my fault anymore. Its all your fault. You need to grow the fuck up and learn how to deal with things. I still love you madley. I really wish I could throw some shit at you. I wish even more that you would just realise how close I really am to leaving you for good.

"It’s like you’re screaming and no one can hear. You almost feel ashamed that someone could be that important, that without them you feel like nothing. No one will ever understand how much it hurts. You feel hopeless, like nothing can save you. And when it’s over and it’s gone, you almost wish you could have all the bad stuff back, so you can have the good."

I just wanna dissapear really. I also feel like no one would even notice if I did. I wouldnt be missed, or even thought of. Ive started to not like who I am. Not like who Ive become. I wonder if its a momentary thing, or if i just genuinely dont like myself. I dont understand why anyone would love me, why any one would even like me, wanna spend time with me. I dont even.

I know you a suppose to love yourself before you can love someone else. I feel like its the other way around for me.

Sometimes I wonder if this is my future. To just fade away without a trace, never be loved the way I loved, to always create these problems or have these situations come my way and spend my whole time battling them. I really dont feel strong enough for any more heart ache or break. I dont. It just seems like everyone in my life is eager to leave it. I can see why. Guess im easy to leave.

Put on a brave face and no one will notice I guess.

Wishing I could have a complete make over. I want to start again. I dont like who Ive become. Im lacking motivation. I lack drive. I lack everything that I like in someone else.