"It’s like you’re screaming and no one can hear. You almost feel ashamed that someone could be that important, that without them you feel like nothing. No one will ever understand how much it hurts. You feel hopeless, like nothing can save you. And when it’s over and it’s gone, you almost wish you could have all the bad stuff back, so you can have the good."

I just wanna dissapear really. I also feel like no one would even notice if I did. I wouldnt be missed, or even thought of. Ive started to not like who I am. Not like who Ive become. I wonder if its a momentary thing, or if i just genuinely dont like myself. I dont understand why anyone would love me, why any one would even like me, wanna spend time with me. I dont even.

I know you a suppose to love yourself before you can love someone else. I feel like its the other way around for me.

Sometimes I wonder if this is my future. To just fade away without a trace, never be loved the way I loved, to always create these problems or have these situations come my way and spend my whole time battling them. I really dont feel strong enough for any more heart ache or break. I dont. It just seems like everyone in my life is eager to leave it. I can see why. Guess im easy to leave.

Put on a brave face and no one will notice I guess.